The Dumpster Fire - Signature Yoyo of 2020

  • $50.00 USD
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The Dumpster Fire

Here at Rain City Skills we try to be responsive to the ever-changing world and the needs of our customers. 2020 has been such an... interesting...year that we decided it needed it's own signature yoyo.
 
Last December we released the "Stoopid Capitalism Day Tree"
I gave Justin instructions to make it awful. He failed; people enjoyed it. I decided to give him one more chance before hanging him upside down by his feet while an army of Kindergarteners tickled him with taser-feathers.
 
"Make this yoyo the worst yoyo ever to exist."
I said this.
He did it.
 

From Justin Scott Larson who did the math to create the design

"Of note. It's not some shit tier hot garbage Yoyo. It's engineered specifically to suck. It's not a brick, or gigantic, or vibey. It doesn't have any cutting or chomping edges like the breathe. It's specifically designed to make you question your life choices up to this moment."


The dumpster fire is evil. It hates you so much. It will make you want to quit yoyoing. You will regret buying this yoyo immediately. 
 
But you will also fight anyone who tries to take it away.
 
It's just that bad.

4 colourways.
1. Dumpster on Fire
2. Politics. Ew.
3. Nuclear Winter
4. "Everything is Fine (White Privilege Sonata)"

Specs

Weight - 0.013 moose turds (64.4g)
Width - 1.12 Timbits (33.2mm)
Diameter - a cookie from a thin tree (54.4mm)
Bearing - Size C Flat - specially treated with carefully sourced materials to ensure responsive play. You might be able to clean it for unresponsive play, but I highly doubt it.  You can throw in a slim C bearing, if you don't actually want to play with it. But really, why would you?
In the Box 
Garbage. What were you expecting?


Purchase at your own risk, there will be no refunds or exchanges. It's really, really awful. You've been warned.
 
 
But you do.

 I'll leave you with this. Apparently Weird Al knew I was releasing this and composed a theme song for it.  Below is a video of the Dumpster Fire being forged.